WWE Royal Rumble Review: What The Damn Hell WWE?

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For about 3 hours and 20 minutes the 2017 Royal Rumble was a fun and entertaining affair (5 hours and 20 minutes if you include the pre-show matches), however like the WWE has done for the last 4 years now it seems like they are hell bent on ruining the Royal Rumble.

The matches leading up to the Rumble were all good to great, with the highlight being AJ Styles vs John Cena, a match, that whoever you were rooting for, in the end you came out of the match a happy fan.

But I’m not here to review the who Pay Per View, like I said in my opening paragraph 90% of the show was fantastic and a lot of fun. Even with the pre-show the event had a brisk pace and in all honesty it didn’t feel like 6 hours, in fact most of the actual Rumble match was a lot of fun with some great spots.  Jack Gallagher coming in with his umbrella was a lot of fun especially with him being eliminated by Mark Henry and basically Mary Poppins-y his way out of the ring.  Chris Jericho playing chicken, Bron Stroman’s dominance, Sami Zayn’s constantly hitting spots, Luke Harper turning on Bray Wyatt, and really the only surprise of the night that wasn’t really a surprise was Tye Dillinger coming in at #10 and the fans shouting “10 10 10 10”.

The Rumble was a lot of fun, but then we started to approach the end and in my head I’m counting how many spots are left and who I knew was in the Rumble and all of sudden I began to realize that we might not get any surprises.  Brock came in and started suplexing everyone (yawn, I’m seriously over Brock), then Goldberg came out and destroyed Brock, and then Taker came out at 29 and took out Goldberg, that left us with one last spot to get a surprise that would send all of us fans into hysteria.  Who would it be?  Samoa Joe? Finn Balor?  Kurt Angle?  Kenny Omega?  Sting?  How awesome would it have been for it to be Sting and we get a Sting and Taker stare down?  But no, the clock reaches zero and Roman Reigns’ music hits, and I kid you not, this made my son cry.  He so badly wanted his favorite Finn Balor to come out (like most of the WWE Universe) but no we got Reigns.

I’ve tried to defend Reigns, not that I’m a fan, but I’ve felt bad for the guy because he’s been booked so horribly that it makes it impossible to root for him.  However, this was the final straw.  If I never see Reigns in the squared circle again it will be too soon.  Reigns comes in and starts to dominate and all I can think is “does Vince McMahon actually hate Roman Reigns?  Why would he do this to the man,” he had to have known that the boos would just be ridiculous.  Reigns eliminates the Undertaker and not to mention Bray Wyatt and mercifully he is eliminated by Randy Orton, I honestly never thought I’d ever be happy to see the Viper win the Rumble, to quote King Ross of What Culture, “new era, same old shit”.

Reigns coming in at 30 signals two annoying trends with the WWE.  Either Vince or the writers think it’s funny to troll the fans.  “They want this, and we’ll give them that” which can be funny from time to time, but it has seriously gotten ridiculous, especially with the Rumble the last 4 years.  Batista was booed out of the building when he won, because we wanted Daniel Bryan, same thing happened to Reigns two years ago , because again, we felt it should have been Bryan’s moment, then last year, Triple H winning was the lesser of two evils, but we knew where it would end.  There was a lot of buzz going into the Rumble match because this was one of the more predictable ones in a long while and there was hope with all the push to a new era that we’d not only get a first time winner, but possible one of the newer stars like a Sami Zayn or Bron Stroman, it would have been great, but no, new era, same shit.

In the end the Pay Per View was a fun overall event, but like the last several entries the ending just left us all feeling flat and forgetting about all the previous spots of the night that left us feeling happy.  We’ll have to wait to see Raw tonight to see if Roman Reigns has finally gone full heel, because if he hasn’t last night’s 30 entry of him was a waste and even more piss poor booking by the WWE.  So what did you think of the Rumble last night?  What was your favorite match?  Let us know in the comments below.

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About Josh McCain 984 Articles
Where are my manners, allow myself to introduce... ah... myself. I'm Josh, I'm a proud dad and I will probably write the majority of the content you see on this site (and editing 100% of it) because that's my background, writing. I'm an author of two books (Ripper, and Suburban Sky: American Tales) with books three and four on the way... eventually. I also have experience writing for various sites, including Bleacher Report, Redskins101, and more currently you can find me at Goingfor2.com where I write a weekly-ish satirical column. Here are the links to my books if you wish to check them out. Click here for Ripper: http://goo.gl/YGKNSj Click here for Suburban Skies: http://goo.gl/1zrZ6d So that's me in a nutshell. I hope you enjoy the site.

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