In honor of Mad Max: Fury Road and the Mad Max Video game being released today, our Battle Grounds is going post-apocalyptic! Today Nelson and I debate which post-apocalyptic movie universe we’d like to live in and then debate who’s right. Here’s a hint, I’m right. Nelson, as usual go ahead and start.
Nelson: Alrighty, the post-apocalyptic world I’ve chosen is Zombieland. I chose this specifically because it set its rules right at the beginning and didn’t waiver, so it seems to be the most consistent. Given its consistency, I don’t have to worry about fast transformations like those of 28 days later or world war z, supplies seem to be easier to come across, and the infrastructure of the United States has not decayed to the point of failure. Overall the world of Zombieland though seeming like the “Vaction home” of zombie worlds still also has the potential brutality of its other movie (and TV) counterparts, but I have better odds at survival.
Josh: Not a bad pick, my pick though would be the Matrix. The reason why I chose this movie universe is that I don’t know I’m in a dystopian future. As far as I’m concerned I’m just living my normal life going to my normal job and my life isn’t threaten by psychos, zombies, aliens, or killer robots. I just get up go to work, write for a web site, play video games and drink scotch. It’s the best post-apocalyptic world you can hope for.
Nelson: That’s not a bad pick either. And I’d have picked that IF and only if it was one of two scenarios, IF I was the one OR I had no knowledge of the the truth. Anywhere in between really kinda sucks. It sucks because you’ll either reach your limit very quickly and STILL don’t stand a chance or you’re living in Zion. With Zombieland there’s still tons of danger but this is essentially going back to basics. As much as I love my Xbox, smartphone, laptop and etc, I don’t really need it to live. Not to mention if the matrix reality is anything like it is out here right now in the real world, I’d rather have the zombies. At least if one pisses me off I can kill it and not worry about legal repercussions just possible swarming and zombification.
Josh: Don’t lie, you need your xbox and iphone to live, you don’t fool me Sayson! But back to the argument, of all the zombie movies and shows to pick from you choose one where they run! Why oh why would you pick one where they run, I’ve seen you run, you’re not out running the Usane Bolt of Zombies, you’re fucked. Also I wouldn’t want to be the one in the Matrix because then you know the truth. I’d take which other color pill made me forget if I was approached by Morphius, I wouldn’t want to know the truth. Everytime someone in a movie offers you the truth your life is about to get shitty, fuck that noise. Also you know what, if you die in the matrix it’s pretty much the same as real life, natural causes or murder, or you know a death that happens to you in the real world, which means odds are it’s when you’re old. In Zombieland, odds are your death is going to be pretty painful as you’re eaten alive and if you’re lucky you’re dead and not another zombie, because you know what, we don’t know what it’s like to be a zombie, it could be like the Metallica video for One, you could be trapped in your own mind just watching your corpse wander around.
Nelson: Ok, that’s not how I really run. Don’t ask me why I do that stupid jog, but that’s not how I’d out run zombies. Also you’re forgetting the fact that as a part of the matrix blind to the truth that you’re one mod away from being a zombie anyway because and I quote ” the dead is liquefied and fed intravenously to the living”. One patch from some dick hacker and you’re living in COD: Zombies. Not to mention I can hide from zombies can’t really hide from agents nor would I stand a chance going toe to toe with one. Living in that kind of digital world has too many unforeseen variable introduced by “reloaded” and “revolutions” for my tastes.
Josh: I assume that if I was in the Matrix I’d just be me so I highly doubt any hacker or agent would fuck with me, nor would I be in the way of Neo or his friends. I’d be fine living my life in ignorance of the war. Yes you can hide from the Zombies but as we’ve seen in every zombie movie and show, hiding only lasts for so long. Eventually some horde of zombies would stumble upon you or you’d have to fight off some bandits or just retreat. Either way your life would be in constant danger and each day you’d wonder if today is the day you die horribly. Mine might be boring but it’s safe.
Nelson: You’re right, my life would be in constant danger, but you getting to live a boring life inside the matrix the way you want is “best case scenario” truth be told if you’re anywhere close to where shits going down that requires an agent, you’re just as likely to have one jump into you. Or just be in the wrong place wrong time (see the freeway scene in Reloaded) and your survival rate drops dramatically. From what I understand of the matrix, I believe the world is just the one city, making it more likely to run into those terrorists.
Josh: I still have an Xbox and iPhone!
Nelson: Damn! Touché!
There you have it dear reader, our picks for the “ideal” (if there is such a thing) post-apocalyptic world. What one would pick? Zombies (preferably the slow kind), the Matrix, Terminator, Mad Max, or one of the many, many others that exist in books, video games, or movies, please comment below and let us know.
Also Mad Max: Fury Road is out on Blu-Ray and DVD today and is pretty fucking awesome (you can use that quote in the commercials WB) as well as the Mad Max Video Game out for Xbox One, PS4 and PC.
Also, if you’ve never seen Metallica’s One, what the hell is wrong with you. Check it out below.